New Years resolutions every bride should take care not to make, and the realities behind the lofty ideals: by Carrie Marsden
Right, this year I will absolutely never eat chocolate ever again. I will always, always take my make-up off before bed; I won’t ever get drunk and sleep in my contact lenses; I’ll wash the kitchen floor at least once a week; I’ll go to hot yoga classes every day; I’ll have one glass of Prosecco a week – nay, a month; I’ll be one of those women who wears matching underwear, and I’ll have shiny, bouncy hair every day for the rest of my life. Easy. Job done.
Hmm. Oh the optimism. We doubt there’s a woman alive who hasn’t succumbed to the Bridget Jones style of making New Years resolutions. And what about brides? For you – and wherever you are on the wedding countdown – New Year’s resolutions feel heightened and imbued with a sense of weighty significance like never before. With 12 months of the brand new 2020 tumbling ever closer, we bring you the top bridal New Year’s resolutions we don’t think you should ever make, and the reality behind the lofty ideals. The advice that follows is practical, tried and tested, and most importantly, achievable…
I will never, ever eat chocolate again
Yeah, you will. And you should positively revel in this fact. Oh the joy therein! Nothing good can come of denying yourself this utter, incandescent bliss (there’s a Galaxy Caramel open in front of us as we type). But you’ve got a wedding dress to fit into, we hear you cry! Ok, so let’s talk diet. Better still, let’s re-cast this discussion and dispense with this horrible word: no to the diet, yes to the fabulous fuel of life! This year, you’ll be asking something unique of your body: you’ll be asking it to put on the dress of your dreams in front of everyone you know in the world and stand next to the guy you’ll be spending the rest of your life with. Your body deserves so much TLC! Give it nurturing, sustaining, healthy food over a year-long period and you will see it glow. (NB: This includes chocolate every now and again).
I will exercise every day of the year
No, you won’t. And thank goodness. Think of your body as your own baby and you’re halfway there: you would never punish your own baby in this way, pushing it to its absolute limits. With a baby, you nurture and love and listen to what it needs. Your body needs to move to stay active and healthy (and because we’ve got our eye on The Dress). So alongside the Fabulous Fuel, look at your schedule and be brutally real with yourself: aim to commit to an iron-clad once-a-week exercise session at the very least. Top tip for making this a reality: make a pact with a girlfriend (you go together every week for six months then treat yourselves to a spa break), or get hubby-to-be on board (pre-wedding couples’ runs are the big thing for 2020. You heard it here first…).
I will always take my make-up off before bed
We believe in this one but, alas, the spirit is willing… Taking care of your beauty regime is, however, fundamental and can
make a huge difference for your wedding day if you get a system in place now. I ask myself honestly if women the world over really do have time to cleanse, tone and moisturise every day, twice a day, and then ponder if I’m perhaps the laziest woman alive. But I think this is doable. And nothing motivates like an impending wedding day. The department store is your friend here: Debenhams and John Lewis offer some fantastic in-store skin care advice that is tailor-made to work for you after a personalised consultation.
I will always put the marriage first, never the wedding
This is so hard! Because we absolutely get that the wedding day is huge to you. It’s huge to us too – we’ve dedicated our lives to it! Sliding into a snowballing fury of resentment against the groom-to-be because he appears to be wilfully misunderstanding the difference between cream and white (why doesn’t he get how important that is?!), is, unfortunately, an inevitable offshoot of this wedding-planning process. And it’s a process you’ll have to negotiate together. With great candour, you may be required to ask of yourself every now and again: am I putting the wedding before my marriage? He may well have to ask himself some searching questions, too (‘I need to care more about this because it’s so important to her’), but as long as you hold on to your sense of humour, this will be an important journey you both share. Instead of (or as well as) vowing to spend every weekend preoccupied with wedding plans, vow also to do one thing together that brings to the fore the marriage ahead and the love you both share (ps discussing the wedding is off limits!).
I will make all my wedding invites myself
Also known as the ‘this wedding won’t be expensive at all’ fallacy. If you’re lucky enough to be blessed with a devastatingly efficient DIY streak, we say go for it. This certainly is a user-friendly way to save money and can even be a whole lot of fun (get your maids round for a ‘Prosecco and Pimp My Invites’ session). The danger here lies in the pressure you put on yourself for sourcing everything and then holding yourself alone accountable. Being budget-savvy is an excellent ideal to strive for but let others in – allow them to help you and be prepared to relinquish control over the finer details or you’ll go quite, quite mad.
I will never ever not once (even for a teeny moment) become a Bridezilla
You might, lovely. It has been known. It’ll be the seating plan (heaven help us all), or the lighting, or because the chairs need to be a quarter-inch to the left, and suddenly you’re a sobbing mess on the floor at the rehearsal, clinging on to the vicar for dear life. We are not mocking – this has afflicted us all. Be kind to yourself. No resolutions about ‘keeping things in perspective’. Accept that you might very well lose the plot (perspective? This is your wedding!) and wish, instead, for the good grace to be able to laugh.
(Main imagecredit: Kit Myers Photography)
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