No one ever told me that! Our surprising (and sometimes unexpected) ten top tips for an unforgettable wedding day…
“But no one ever told me I wouldn’t get to eat anything!” Ah, ladies. The wonderful wedding day. There is truly nothing like it on earth. But prepare yourselves for some utter madness (on the day; never mind the planning). And for the bride – and speaking as one amongst your ranks who has lived to tell the tale – there are most certainly some surprising and unexpected elements of the day itself that you should be aware of. So consider this your heads up. Our must-read, ten top tips for the discerning bride with guest author Wendy Dessler…
Wedding days are complicated. The day itself is complicated. Utterly joyful, of course, but complicated. There are a lot of moving parts, and a lot of actors – many of whom are wearing the fanciest garb they will ever put on (like mint green bridesmaid gowns, for example, and men in tuxedos). Here’s how to expect the unexpected:
1. You won’t get to eat (probably).
All that time you spent in tastings and agonizing over chicken or beef and chances are, you’ll struggle to find the time or appetite. Don’t let this be you! One bride teed up a waiter whose sole job was to ensure the bride and groom had their own private supply of canapés (love this idea!). If you’re worried about nerves, eating a sensible and filling breakfast will help keep your energy levels up. Or you could do what I did… eat three chocolate croissants back to back on the morning of the big day (my most delicious memory and it always makes me laugh!).
2. You won’t speak to all of your guests.
You may be so busy that you don’t get to see all of your guests. Plan a pre-wedding get-together or a post-wedding brunch so you can spend time with all of your loved ones.
3. ‘It’s midnight ALREADY?!’
Time flies. Invest in a great wedding photographer and videographer so you get to enjoy all of the great memories.
4. Some people might be no-shows
You think you’ve nailed down all of your RSVPs, but someone will fail to attend and fail to warn you. No, you can’t send a bill afterwards, so anticipate that it will happen and know that it’s part of the cost of a wedding.
5. ‘Er, hello stranger…’
Someone will probably show up who didn’t RSVP or wasn’t invited. You’ll have to decide in advance how you want to handle this rude, but quite normal, behavior. We’re not talking wedding crashers – we’re talking about someone bringing a plus-one that you didn’t expect. You can have them turned away at the door, but do determine whether losing their friendship is worth it or not. If your invitees tend to be a bit unreliable, you might want to warn you caterer and reserve a few spots in advance in case they need to be seated.
6. ‘I don’t know who you are… but I love you very much…’
Emotions run really high – and not just for the couple of the day. If you plan on alcohol featuring in any sort of way (and we’re guessing you might), then expect the highs as well as the lows. Guests and family fuelled up on, er, love, can make for some wonderfully exuberant moments. To stave off any concerns about proceedings taking the other track, surround yourself with non-dramatic, reliable loved ones who will protect you from such drama. And if it does come to your attention, know that it is not your responsibility to diffuse it. Don’t let anything mar your day.
7. ‘Actually, I’m a fruitarian… I can’t possibly eat that…’
Someone will change meal choices. After all of that careful recording and reporting to your caterer, someone is going to look at a neighbour’s plate and decide that it looks better than what they ordered. It will drive your caterer nuts, but professionals anticipate this, so don’t worry too much. And again, better to have reserves of everything in the bank (or cupboard).
8. Wardrobe malfunction…
Bridal gowns aren’t all built for comfort. If the thought of those elaborate, eat-your-heart-out-Dirty-Dancing moves you had planned on the dance floor seem increasingly unlikely in your lace-up fishnet gown, then this most seriously is food for thought. Match your gown and look to who you are and what you intend to do all day long!
9. Brides’ speeches go down a treat!
Although not for everyone, a bride commandeering the microphone to say a few words is a guaranteed crowd pleaser. You’ll never have a better opportunity to address everyone in the world whom you love and cherish – and all conveniently sat under one roof/marquee/tipi etc!
10. Perfectionists, we are (gloriously) not…
Something (and possibly many things) will go wrong. This is hard to accept, but it’s a wedding fact. Few key players know what perfect is supposed to look like, so as long as your guests are safe and comfortable, do your very best to go with the flow. And with this philosophy in place, you’ll be able to laugh the whole day long!